Today

It was so nice not to have to go to work today! I mailed some ebay things that I sold and watched some scary movies. Not sure why I felt the need to watch scary movies, maybe because my life scares me? I seriously have never ever watched any by myself. I watch them with my husband but no way alone.

I haven't been feeling well today...TMI coming. I started depo back in September and had no period until this past Sunday when I started spotting (it was a hard decision for me to get back on birth control and because of recent issues, I'm done). I have been on my period since Monday. Heavy flow and stomach problems. Now, I am a 4 day period girl. Seriously I start day 1 with little to nothing, day two is heavy, day three is meh and day four is practically over. To have 5 days of heavy bleeding is well causing me concern to say the least. I have also passed two big clumps of tissue which really bother me because this has NEVER happened. I am monitoring it over the weekend and kind of taking it easy because I am also having bad cramps when I get up and move around. If this period isn't over by Monday I am calling my gyno. I am so sick of doctors. I'm so weak feeling. I honestly have crapped out everything I have eaten this week. Seriously lost about 5 pounds, I can tell in my face. I don't look good.

One week from tomorrow and I will be 37, wow what a year. Changed jobs, more elbow surgery, pregnant, miscarriage, D&C, and major emotional stress. I'm kind of over this year. Actually, I was kind over last year as well. I pray that year 37 will be awesome, but honestly I am not optimistic at all. I feel like I have been slapped in the face over and over. And the gray hairs...oh my gosh..really sore subject.

I'm bored tonight. It's 5:30 and I'm kind of ready to go to bed. If I don't figure out something to do, it's going to be a night of crying. But hey, what's new on that end.